Referendum

 

Dear Agony Aunt

I believe I’m losing my mind

I’ve started to believe in nightmares

Boris as PM and Gove Deputy

These nightmares are becoming daily prayers

The first one landed on my bed and pinned me to the sheets

at precisely 6am on 24 June

Please can you prescribe an anti-inflammatory

Please can you section me

Please can you confine me

to this green and pleasant land

The Morning After

I am busy writing a book for publication so will not be posting so often from now on. I will try and post something once a month though! ‘Weddings’ was the topic for my writers’ group this week.

I can’t remember any church bell

but imagine we drank many a toast.

You danced and pranced like a young gazelle

but I recall snorting candy the most.

*

I can’t remember giving you a ring

but can see your purple wedding dress.

You said you didn’t want a freaky fling

I said these days we couldn’t care less.

*

I admired your beautiful blue eyes,

you said you’d travelled fast and so far,

I wondered if you often told lies,

we sped home in a spanking new car.

*

I caressed your shapely malachite ears

but wondered how you saw with three eyes,

you told me you’d travelled ninety light years

from a world of terrible red skies.